5771 פרשת וישב

 In this week’s Parsha, the Torah describes to us how the brothers of Yosef plotted to kill him.  Reuvein then convinced his brothers not to kill Yosef and threw him into a pit with the intention of taking him home when he returned. In the end while Reuvein was gone, the brothers sold Yosef as a slave to Egypt.

 The Siforno explains to us what the conversations were among the brothers and what caused them to change their minds regarding what to do with Yosef.

 At first, the brothers felt that Yosef was trying to cause them to lose either their life in this world or their life in olam haba or both. Due to this, the brothers judged Yosef as a Rodef and felt that it was the correct decision for him to be killed.

 When Reuvein was away, Yehudah made a decision that instead of killing Yosef they should sell him. When Yehudah was explaining the logic behind his decision he said to his brothers, what will we gain by killing Yosef that we could not accomplish by selling him. There are two reasons to kill a rodef, which is what they judged Yosef to be. The first reason is to punish the person who is doing the wrong thing. In this case, explained Yehudah, if we would kill Yosef we would be punishing ourselves as we would feel bad for killing him and for acting cruelly towards him. The second reason would be in order to frighten other people who would then be afraid to try and hurt the brothers. In this case, we would not have that benefit either as we would not tell anyone so as not to let our father know about it.

 If we look at this Siforno a little more closely we can ask the following question. If the brothers originally considered all the ramifications of their actions, then how is it possible that they came to a different conclusion than what they finally concluded which was not to kill Yosef but rather to sell him?

 We may be able to answer this question by seeing how the Siforno explains what Reuvein told the brothers when he tried to convince them not to kill Yosef. The Siforno explains that Reuvein told his brothers not to make a mistake out of haste that can not be corrected.

 It would seem from this that when the brothers first decided their case against Yosef, they believed that he was guilty of being a rodef and needed to be stopped. Since on some level, they felt jealous of Yosef, they were only able to see the obvious way to stop Yosef and that was through killing him. Only after Reuvein told them that they were rushing into a decision and needed to think it through were they able to realize that there were other better options to stop Yosef rather than killing him.

 This can teach us a very important lesson. There are many times in our lives that we make decisions in situations that we assume are correct. However, when we make the decisions we may not be taking into consideration other feelings we may have that might be influencing our decisions. We must constantly try to ensure that when we are making our decisions we do so with as few biases as possible so our decisions will truly be the correct ones.

פרשת וישב 5770

 In this week’s Parsha, the Torah begins by describing the events that led to the sale of Yosef to Egypt and his subsequent rise to power as the second in command of Egypt. The first Pasuk begins with the following phrase: “These are the generations of Yaakov, Yosef.” Many of the commentaries are bothered by the phraseology used in the Pasuk. If the Torah was trying to tell us that Yosef was a child or a descendent of Yaakov it should have said. “Yosef is the son of Yaakov.” The commentaries then give different interpretations of what the Pasuk is trying to teach us.

 There are several explanations brought down by Rashi which can easily explain the juxtaposition of the name of Yosef to Yaakov. The first being that Yosef looked like Yaakov and the second being that the same things that Yaakov went through Yosef went through.

 However, the Ohr Hachayim gives a totally different reason which is that all the difficult situations that Yaakov went through from having to run away from Eisav to having to deal with Lavan to the things that happened to his daughter Dina were like nothing to him compared to the pain he felt to losing Yosef.

 If we look at the Ohr Hachayim a little more closely we can ask the following question. We know the Torah is not a history book that tells us stories about what happened to people but the Torah with every word is teaching us an important lesson. This being the case telling us that all the other suffering that Yaakov went through was like nothing compared to the pain he felt due to the loss of Yosef would seem extra.

 The answer could be that the Torah is teaching us that there is a way for a person who is going through suffering to lighten the load he is carrying and be able to accept it better. In truth, we know that everything that happens to us is from God and for our benefit but sometimes when the suffering is very intense it can be very difficult to focus on that. However, if a person is able to minimize the feelings of suffering somehow, it will be easier for him to focus on the fact that the suffering is truly good for him and from God.

 A person might be able to do this if they can consider always that things could be worse and that this is really not so bad considering. This could be what the Torah is telling us here. When Yaakov went through the loss of Yosef all the other suffering he went through was not even considered to him to be suffering anymore at all even though at the time each one felt like suffering. What we see from here is that if a person considers even when he is going through a difficult time how much worse it could be he would be able to minimize the feelings of suffering in his life and be able to focus on all the good he truly has.

פרשת וישב 5769  

 In this week’s Parsha the Torah describes to us the occurrences that caused Yosef Hatzadik to be sold as a slave to Egypt. The Torah tells us that the brothers were jealous of the relationship Yosef had with their father Yaakov. The Torah then describes to us how Yosef told over the dreams he had, which implied that he would rule over his brothers, to them. The Torah describes the reaction of the brothers the following way:

The brothers’ hatred of Yosef increased because of the dreams and words of Yosef.

 The Pasuk seems to differentiate between the “words” and the “dreams” of Yosef.  The commentaries are bothered by what is the difference between the “dreams” of Yosef and the “words” of Yosef. The Rabbeinu Bechai explains that when the Pasuk said that the brothers hated Yosef because of his “dreams”, it meant that the meaning behind the dreams that Yosef would rule over them caused them to hate Yosef. However, when the Torah says that the brothers hated Yosef because of his “words” it meant that they were upset that Yosef was lauding the dreams over them.

 Later on in the Parsha after the sale of Yosef to Egypt, the Torah interrupts the discussion of the events that occurred to Yosef in Egypt with the events surrounding Yehudah and Tamar. The commentaries all give different reasons for the placement of the story of Yehudah and Tamar in this place. The Rabbeinu Bechai when giving his explanation says a very interesting idea. He answers that both of these events relate to the concept of Gilgul. The 2 children of Tamar were in place of the first two children of Yehudah who had died due to their sins and the ten martyrs were in the place of the Shevatim who sold Yosef.

 The Rabbeinu Bechai asked, how could the ten martyrs be in the place of the Shevatim who sold Yosef? We know that Reuvein was not involved in the sale of Yosef at all, so there were only 9 brothers, why were there ten martyrs. The Rabbeinu Bechai explains that the tenth martyr relates to Yosef himself. Since the brothers would not have sold Yosef if Yosef had not angered them by lauding his dreams over them; he was punished along with the brothers.

 The obvious question that can be asked is that I can understand being punished for causing his brothers anguish, but why should he receive the same punishment as the brothers who sold him into slavery. Even though Yosef caused his brothers great anguish, he did not directly cause them to sell him. Yosef should have gotten punished for his sin with his punishment and the brothers should have been punished for their sin with their punishment.

 The answer can be that we underestimate our responsibility relating to the actions of the people around us. Our actions are not only judged in a vacuum as good or bad, they are judged also by the impact they have on the actions of the people around us. This applies both to good deeds and bad. For example, if a person does a Mitzvah and that Mitzvah causes other people to do Mitzvos, the original act is looked at not only for the one Mitzvah it was, but also as all the Mitzvos that came from it as if he had done them. The opposite is also true. If a person does a sin that causes someone else around him to sin then he is judged not only for his sin in a vacuum but also for the sins he caused as if he had done them We see from this Rabbeinu Bechai how careful we must be with all our actions since we never know how our actions will impact the actions of the people around us whose resulting actions inherently impact how we are judged.

פרשת וישב 5768

 In this week’s Parsha the Torah describes to us the relationship between Yosef and his brothers. When describing the relationship that Yosef had with his brothers, the Torah says as follows:

 And they hated him and could not speak to him peacefully.

 On this Pasuk there is the following interesting idea brought by Rashi:

 From the shame of the brothers that they hated and could not speak peaceably to Yosef, we see their praise that they did not speak differently then they felt in their heart.

 Let us try to understand why the concept of speaking out what we are feeling and the opposite why feeling one thing and saying the opposite is bad.

 The simplest idea is that if a person hates somebody in their heart but acts nicely to them, they would never know that they need to protect themselves from harm that might silently arise from the hate that their “friend” has in his heart. This is a very big reason that Lashon hara is so hurtful, since a person can pal up to his friend and then behind his back say all kinds of bad things about him that can cause him irreparable harm.

 However, there is another reason why it is beneficial to say what you feel and that is that if a person consistently acts against what his true feelings are, it strengthens the trait of sheker.

 However, there are times where it is imperative to do the opposite and that is when telling the truth would hurt another person.

 Now let us take this a step further. If the Torah gave such a tremendous praise to the Shevatim ,to whom we can not even compare, for being able to speak honestly what they feel, it shows us how difficult it really is. What aspect makes it so difficult? The answer could be the difficulty of a person to be truthful when it isn’t really necessarily good for him. This shows us that if telling the truth was so difficult for the Shevatim how much more difficult is it for us. This is why it is so important for a person to work on refining our trait of truth in all aspects of our life, so we actually know that what we are doing is the correct thing to be doing, and not being biased by other factors.

 If we can work on our trait of truth, may we merit that God listen to our prayers and the prayers from the depths of our hearts,(our true feelings), and bring Mashiach.

This Devar Torah is not meant to be taken as halacha. All questions regarding a specific situation should be asked to a Rav. 

 5767 פרשת וישב

 In this week’s Parsha there is a very interesting midrash. On the pasuk that says:

 And Reuvein heard that they wanted to kill Yosef and he saved him from them.

The midrash says the following:

  The midrash based on the explanation of the commentaries explains why Reuvein wanted to save Yosef. It explains that the dreams of Yosef took place shortly after the sin of Reuvein. At that time Reuvein thought that he was pushed away from the rest of the brothers and when Yosef told over his dreams to the brothers he described 11 stars bowing to him so that Reuvein knew that he was still considered one of the Shevatim. Due to the fact that Yosef made it known to Reuvein that he was still considered to be one of the shevatim, Reuvein felt the need to save Yosef.

 Let us examine this midrash a little more closely. There is a very interesting question that can be asked on this midrash:

1. Chazal tell us that the brothers had concluded that Yosef was a Rodeph and was subject to the death penalty, even if we say that Yosef did Reuvein a favor, even a big one, will that change the halacha? If someone is guilty of a crime, you should find them guilty even if they once did a favor for you.

 We might be able to answer this question as follows. Many situations have more than one possible interpretation. There are times where a situation on the surface leans 99.999 percent in one direction that there is no real question to the person looking at it as to what really occurred. However, we know that on many occasions there is always that .0001 percent chance that we are looking at a situation incorrectly. Most times a person will never even give that .0001 percent a second thought.  However, sometimes there can be a situation where the person doing the judging will look for the .0001 percent. For example the relative of the person will always look to judge him favorably.

 There are also other things that can get a person to look for that .0001 percent. One thing that can impact a person to think again about a situation is if they feel some kind of indebtedness to them. This is the case with Reuvein and Yosef. Even though Reuvein had his mind already made up that Yosef was a Rodeph and was subject to the death penalty, nevertheless when he felt this feeling of appreciation to Yosef it made him look at the situation again in a different light and come up with a different halacha. In fact, the new halacha was the correct one. When the first pesak was arrived at, there was some very small level of bias that caused them not to see the possibility, as small as it was, that Yosef was not acting improperly against them. Only Reuvein who had this feeling towards Yosef was able to see the situation perfectly clearly and decide to save Yosef.

 However, as we know these types of feelings for others can chas veshalom at times cause us to judge someone improperly too. This is why the Torah prohibited judges from taking bribes even of the smallest item since it could pervert the way they look at a court case.

This doesn’t only apply to judges but also the way we interact with people in our own lives. We judge people every day, whether it is our co-workers, our clients, our friends or family it is our job to judge them correctly. As the Torah tells us we have to judge people with the benefit of the doubt.

 The question then becomes when is it proper to use these feelings to reevaluate a situation and when is it bribery and improper?

Furthermore, if the Shevatim could have made a mistake and had made the wrong psak halacha, how can we insure that we will judge situations properly? 

The answer is that there is no 100% answer, however there are 2 things we can do to help us look at things properly.

1. To try to remove any bad feelings we may feel towards a person. These can always bias a person against someone else.
2. Work on our trait of emes – truthfulness. If our trait of emes is honed very well, we will be able to more easily detect if we are looking at a situation properly and without any biases or not.

 If we can work on this trait and always try to judge people properly, to the best of our ability God will judge us for good and bring us the redemption quickly in our time.